Amazing

I’m old. I’m married. And I’m drunk. And I just had the best sex of my life, with my partner. Pshsaaw on the youngsters who think they have the market on sex cornered! Pshaaw I say

Life is grande.

Small voices

Someone called me today and made me aware of something rotten and I don’t know what to do.

The company I work for has been threatening cutbacks since the whole recession fiasco started and we’ve all been made pretty fucking scared to say the least. 

Someone found out lately that this company has been filtering money to beat the band leaving the rest of us screwed.  At least that’s what people think is happening, there can’t be another explanation for it.  We the office workers are in the minority – too many chiefs make correspondance sticky, but there’s obviously money going missing somewhere and they’re not saying a word.

This person that called me has put it upon me to help rally people together and fight for our jobs but I’m shitscared, I’ve no clue about politics and I’ve a feeling I’ll not just lose my job but my house as well and probably end up in jail.  Big companies don’t like small voices.

I can’t face work tomorrow not knowing who’s privvy and who’s not and not knowing what to say or where to start, I can’t let my collegues down though and maybe ruin their lives by staying quiet.

I’m even scared about posting this here I’m so fucking paranoid but I have to say it somewhere, I can’t even tell my own wife.

Energy

I ran up a flight of stairs the other day. Not a big deal right? Well.. actually it is a big deal, hence me blogging about it, and blogging here   A month ago I could barely drag myself up the same flight of stairs at our local mall, my partner had to help me and I had to stop and rest half way up. On Saturday, I actually ran up that same flight.

And I’ve lost 8 pounds doing nothing different. I am not exercising (yet), and I’m actually eating more.
And my taste buds have come back and I can taste more than just curry and bitter chocolate.
And my eyesight is no longer blurry
And I’m not a solid block of frozen flesh (which is probably the most welcome change out of them all)
And I’m not done in for the entire day after a roll in the hay with my partner
And I can concentrate again and am almost able to multitask
And the meds are not doing anything weird to my heart murmur and the initial profuse sweating is gone

All for one little pill a day – and the meds are making enough thyroid hormone for my body to work almost back to where it should be. I still have a ways to go in terms of energy levels, but I’m thinking exercise will help kick that back in… and I still need to lose the extra 20 pounds I’ve put on since my last chemo two years ago, but at least I’ve lost 8 pounds doing nothing and eating properly again and my weight isnt creeping up daily like it did.

I just thought I’d come back and update.

YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL